Oh man! It's another entry of Spooky's Animal Kingdom! I'm gonna talk about several animals today, called the Bremen Town Musicians. Or the Musicians of Bremen Town. Or the Town of Bremen's Musicians. Or the Town Musicians of Bremen. Or... I give up.

Yes, dear friends. This is an artist's horrifying interpretation of the Bremen Town Musicians doing what they do best: standing on top of each other and screaming at people. They hail from a darker time in history, from a time before women could vote and back when people would drink mercury to cure their hiccups. The Grimm brothers left a record of their many accomplishments, for they were truly heroes of their time.

The Bremen Town Musicians consist of a donkey, a dog, a cat, and a rooster. They each came from different farms and had good paying jobs with wicked dental plans, until their masters, the farmers, all simultaneously decided to lay them off. So, rather than sticking around to be made into food or tacky taxidermy statues, they left their farms and talked amongst themselves about what to do next. They'd heard that Bremen Town was a place known for its freedom, and decided to go there. Along the way, they found a house in the middle of nowhere. The lights were on, and they decided to go inside, as animals tend to do. Inside, they found a gang of thieves, scoundrels, and roustabouts making fun of the people they'd robbed. The animals did what any upstanding animal would do in this situation: they stood on top of each other and screamed. The criminals were terrified. A manticore was in their house! So they fled into the night. Later that night, one of the thieves came back to see whether or not it really was a manticore, and the dog, the cat, and the donkey beat him half to death while the rooster screamed at his face. The man hobbled away, and the day was saved.

The Bremen Town Musicians never actually went to Bremen Town, nor were they ever really musicians at all. They beat up some dudes and lived happily ever after in a stolen house, living a good life with fancy food and nice swag they stole from the guys who stole the stuff to begin with.

The lesson of the story here is... um... hm.

Go to college.