Jump to content
  • entries
    30
  • comments
    441
  • views
    27,807

People talking to their exes, yes or no?

Lord Vectra

1,138 views

Don't forget to comment :)  

12 members have voted

You do not have permission to vote in this poll, or see the poll results. Please sign in or register to vote in this poll.

Mom and I was just discussing this and I wanna know what you guys think.

 

I believe that that, a person should be allowed to still talk to their ex unless they're lunatics. You know what I mean? Let's take a Scenario of Josh and Sally.

 

Josh and Sally dated from age 25 - 30. They break up because they just aren't good as a couple but agrees to be friends because they are better friends than a couple. Let's say at age 35, Josh finds a girl named Brooke.

 

If Brook says "You have to stop talking to Sally if you want to continue this relationship." Should Josh stop talking to Sally?

 

I say no because unless it was a nasty break-up and Sally was the crazy one; I see no problem of them talking to each other. What you are essentially saying is "Don't date your friends." I just don't think a potentially good friendship should be immediately abolished after break-up. Some people are great friends but aren't great as a couple. To me, there isn't really a good reason to say no unless their ex is crazy.

 

If you have a problem with it, with no reason, then you're saying "I don't want her talking to my boyfriend because she used to have him." Yes, people are exes for a reason, but the reason isn't always so serious that the friendship afterwards needs to be extinguished.

 

What do you guys think?



9 Comments


Recommended Comments

To me, society is a waste. (Nothing against anyone here, I think the forum folks and a small handful of people I know are nice and great to be around :D) You have poverty, people being killed over relationships, suicide from relationships... It just gets downright bothersome. However, I do see light in how some relationships are born, but no relationship should be controlled, ex or not.

Share this comment


Link to comment
To me, society is a waste. (Nothing against anyone here, I think the forum folks and a small handful of people I know are nice and great to be around :D) You have poverty, people being killed over relationships, suicide from relationships... It just gets downright bothersome. However, I do see light in how some relationships are born, but no relationship should be controlled, ex or not.

 

I totally agree. Society, lately, has been very twisted in many things (including love).

Share this comment


Link to comment

It sounds more like Brook is worried Josh will hook back up with Sally again then she is making a blanket "TALKING WITH EXES R BAD" statement. It's understandable for someone to be worried about that if they are in a relationship with someone that hangs out with their ex all the time. Heck, it's pretty normal for people to worry about other friends the other person in a relationship hangs out with. Them being exes just rings more alarm bells. It's not really rational most of the time, but human romance hardly ever is.

 

Look, dealing with human relationships is complicated. You don't always have clean breaks with other people. It doesn't help that popular culture like soap operas basically teach all the wrong lessons and tend to make people paranoid about it. But outside of that exact kind of situation where who you care currently in feels threatened by your ex? I don't see how it's anyone's buisness and I think most people really don't care.

Share this comment


Link to comment

I agree will Killo that It's understandable for someone to be worried about that kind of thing. (Brook)

 

Especially if the other person was with them for longer than the new girlfriend/boyfriend is. Jealousy is a normal human emotion. I just think people need to learn to control their jealousy for their significant others sake. It WOULD be a waste of a potentially good friendship. It could even hurt your significant other to have the person so suddenly ripped out of their life. I'm not talking about any romantic attachment they may or may not still have for them. But, the fact that their excuse to the friend is "My new boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't want me to see you anymore." They could really hurt their friend that way and possibly even themselves from the guilt.

 

If I was in this situation I'd probably feel jealous too, but I'd keep it to myself for the sake of the other. Also, what do you expect if you get into a relationship like that? Your in a new relationship. I say, you just have to see where to goes. If they do by any chance ever wish to get back with the other person, I doubt you telling them to break off ties at any time previously would have changed the outcome at all. Maybe they would've broke it off sooner because that to me is VERY controlling. And I wouldn't want to be in a relationship like that. I'd feel like they didn't trust me. And yeah, I'd be upset afterwards. But that just means the relationship wasn't meant to be and it's time to move on.

Share this comment


Link to comment

It really varies with each person and situation. Here's a prime example. I used to date this girl, we were doing great but she eventually broke up with me but at that moment, she was begging me in tears to stay friends with me, even though i didnt felt like it was a good idea i agreed but as it turns out, she really was just lying yet again and forgot about me for good not to mention she havent really talked to me since, and that hurt me even more. So personally, no its not a good idea. Why? Because if you broke up with that person, there was a reason behind it, good or bad, so if they dont make a good boyfriend/girlfriend, why they can make a good friend in general?

Share this comment


Link to comment

It really varies with each person and situation. Here's a prime example. I used to date this girl, we were doing great but she eventually broke up with me but at that moment, she was begging me in tears to stay friends with me, even though i didnt felt like it was a good idea i agreed but as it turns out, she really was just lying yet again and forgot about me for good not to mention she havent really talked to me since, and that hurt me even more. So personally, no its not a good idea. Why? Because if you broke up with that person, there was a reason behind it, good or bad, so if they dont make a good boyfriend/girlfriend, why they can make a good friend in general?

So, the answer depends on the situation? I totally agree. There is no "right" answer for this; if your ex is a lunatic, please, have nothing to do with her but if you have no reason to not be friends, then why diminish it.

Share this comment


Link to comment

So, the answer depends on the situation? I totally agree. There is no "right" answer for this; if your ex is a lunatic, please, have nothing to do with her but if you have no reason to not be friends, then why diminish it.

Like i said before, if that person cannot be trusted as your partner, why be trusted as your friend?

Share this comment


Link to comment

 

So, the answer depends on the situation? I totally agree. There is no "right" answer for this; if your ex is a lunatic, please, have nothing to do with her but if you have no reason to not be friends, then why diminish it.

Like i said before, if that person cannot be trusted as your partner, why be trusted as your friend?

 

Like I said before , some couples are better friends than being together. If that was false, the friend-zone wouldn't exist.

Share this comment


Link to comment

Like i said before, if that person cannot be trusted as your partner, why be trusted as your friend?

 

Typically a friend has a lot less baggage than being a partner. I wouldn't expect a friend or acquaintance to do A LOT of things someone I lived with, or was romantically involved with. Some people can't be trusted to be a partner, but can survive as a friend, or acquaintance.

Share this comment


Link to comment
×
Top ArrowTop Arrow Highlighted