Apparently you missed the second part of my question. Why cover it up given that a cover up of that scale requires so many people being in the know and willing to stay silent, and would ultimately only call attention to the problem. They are better off just denying it. Because guess what? Your so-called 'evidence', even if it did exist, means squat. It doesn't matter. It never mattered. You think facts matter anymore? Heck pretty sure they never did. Pretty sure facts don't even exist. It's all just different levels of manipulation. It's all about who has the more charming voice and who tells you the story you want to hear. And obviously the story you want to hear is that the world is a terrible place that is falling apart and everything will burn.

You know I have been avoiding saying it because I know how annoying it is to hear, how unfair it must sound, how much it must get on your nerves to hear everyone say it again and again... But you know what? I am pretty darn frustrated with you right now so I will say it: You are being melodramatic. No don't you roll your eyes at me missy, you totally are, and goddess darn damn it so am I, and fuckityfuckfuck it's all complete TOTAL NONSENSE! WHY AM I FORCED TO BE THE VOICE OF REASON HERE? YOU AND I BOTH KNOW WE ARE BOTH BATSHIT CRAZY! WHY NOT JUST HAVE FUN WITH IT?

... I get it you think I think this is all just a joke right? Just a way for me to act wacky and put on my little show. Well maybe it partly is, but I am also very serious. And maybe you will get mad at me or maybe you will replay with your infuriating little lols. But you know what? I think I see right through you. But I always think that don't I? It doesn't matter. I am tired now.

They are not only staying silent, they're in denial. I see it firsthand daily.

Go ahead, ignore me, block me, whatever. I told you, and everyone why things are stupid now.

If I am that infuriating, despite the fact that I'm being honest, then...it's hopeless to try to help. I care too much, I am well-aware, but I care because I know we all can be better. But go ahead, berate me, make a doll of me and punish it. I obviously deserve it. Maybe those punishments on the doll will become punishments to me as well. I'll take them.

Oh you would like that wouldn't you? Being made into my doll and lovingly 'punished'. Hehehe... Hey don't look at me like that you walked right into that one with open arms and you know it.

But no, no no no, you don't get the easy way out. See, it's not that I don't think your being honest. It's not that I don't think you care the right amount. It's not like your wrong that we can all be better. It's because every fiber of by being is telling me the same thing: You. Are. Wrong. I may not know what's right, but everything I am tells me that. This isn't about punishment or what you deserve. This is about me being utterly convinced 100% beyond a shadow of a doubt (okay maybe more like 99.9%, as close to 100% as I am able anyway) that what you are describing is not actually reality. Not only that, but the more sure you are that you are right, the more convinced I am that you are not. How could you possibly know? How could you possibly think you have even the slightest idea about what is actually going on? Your acting just like the rest of them. So sure, so absolutely positive you know the shape reality takes.

If you were only 'incorrect', I could let it slide. But no, when I mean Wrong I mean big capital W Wrong. I am pretty sure this isn't simply a mistake, it's poison. Maybe I am the sick one sure. Maybe I am the deluded one. I am willing to admit to the possibility. But I will deal with that if and when I need to. In the meantime, I am not about to let this be. Maybe I care too much as well. And maybe it is hopeless for me to try and help too. But you know what? I kinda enjoy this. Granted I enjoy it more when I am winning, but having an enemy to fight, a mission to accomplish, it's nice sometimes.

So if there is any blocking or ignoring being done, it will be from you to me. And that will make me sad, but I can't give in that easily. Besides, doesn't a part of you want to have this fight? And I think a part of you also knows I am going to win.

9 hours ago, Kayzee said:

...easy way out...

HOLLYWOOD TROPE ALERT HOLLYWOOD TROPE ALERT THIS IS NOT A DRILL THIS IS NOT A DRILL

But you seriously think that me taking the punishments is easy...it might be the simplest solution, to have me offer myself up as the scapegoat, but don't you think for one second that it's in any fucking way, easy. Also, if what I am describing is not reality, then tell me, oh dearest love, what is.

"The pandemic is real and you could get it." ~ is not a response I'll treat as anything but a brainwashed response. Whether the virus is real or not, the number of cases is most certainly not. 

Oh you have no idea how much pain you are in for now do you? Honestly you are going to get punished either way, but unfortunately for you, yes, me cutting off all contact with you was the easy path. Easier then the alternative. And I think l you know that. You sat there begging for that kind of punishment after all. It also would have done squat. That's how it's always gone hasn't it? You drive people away and move on, find somewhere new. Not this time. This time you are dealing with me. Unlike others, I can handle you at your worst. Wanna see if the reverse is true?

Buckle up sweetheart, I am done seeing you spiral down into self-destruction. I have been holding back a lot all this time, but maybe to save you I am going to have to destroy you myself? Should I stop holding back then? You wanna know what I really think of this? No you don't. What you want is for me to shut up and go away forever so you can avoid having to actually defend your beliefs. Both are going to be hard and painful, but me going away at least lets you not have to question your martyr complex and self-righteous need to sabotage yourself doesn't it?

For someone who aspires to be a divine trapped in mortal flesh you act depressingly... well, human. You want to know what reality really is? I have told you time and time again: It doesn't matter. It might not even exist. I keep telling you that. But obviously that's not going to cut it for you, you want something you can hold on to. So okay. I'll tell you something. I imagine right now you are reading these words on a screen of some sort, most likely with your eyes. Go on, reach out and touch the screen. Look around. Touch anything you can. Listen to the sounds the the background. Look at the light and shadows. That is your reality. That's your whole reality right there. Nothing else. This plot you are talking about isn't real. Neither is anything the media tells you. Neither is anything you read. Neither is anything you remember. Nothing is real but what is in front of you RIGHT NOW, and even that is suspect. Not even I am real, not to you.

There is no other reality. There never was and never will be.

Also, I was thinking more dramatic anime speech tropes, but yeah. Tropes exist for a reason you know. I'm actually a fan of them, so expect me to get a little tropey sometimes. Dosn't mean I'm not right.

...

"What you see with your viscera, what you can touch with your skin, what you can hear, that's all that exists, if that."

You've read Shinryu's writings (or this is a strong coincidence). Difference between the context is that Shinryu only meant that as theoretical. You made it sound as if it were undeniable.

That kind of thinking, that kind of logic, is not good to dwell on. Of course, I also know that it is not sound in a practical sense.

Even if it had any practical basis, even if it had some form of practical merit, what use is that kind of logic? Talk about downward spirals! That's circular logic at the highest degree! Fact is, my reality, is not one that's physically tangible anymore, at least, for now. I also never said that I wanted to shoulder my mother's duties, though I also don't think of it as a mindkiller burden either. I never said I aspired to be one of the Divine Twenty-Four, I'm just the only heir to my mother's duties.

No, my aspirations were far lesser; to aid others in the ways I had chosen. I chose the Alchemist's path, and that of herbology/fungology. I had other possible paths, but I wasn't ready to explore those yet. You wouldn't cross my path and see some bright-skinned beauty; you'd see a dark-haired, slightly dirt-speckled busty chick armed with a sword and dagger, a leather satchel and maybe wearing leather and/or a hooded mantle. I may be non-mortal, but that doesn't mean a whole lot.

So, yeah. Con-Vid-19 is not real, but everyone else wants me to believe otherwise, and I'M DAMN SICK OF IT. 

I have not read Shinryu's writings, it's a pretty common philosophical idea. And of course it's not undeniable. My whole point is that everything is deniable. Even that everything is deniable. If you really want to know what use is that kind of logic, it's really really simple. I don't think I have to remind you about one thing:  People are idiots. Did you think you weren't included as 'people'? I sure am!

Heck, you and me? We might be the biggest idiots of all. And crazy to boot. But you see, I know that. I second guess myself. I try and figure things out. I am skeptical, but willing to be skeptical of my skepticism. I try to keep in mind the alternatives and try to reach some kind of truth for myself, no mater how futile it is.

You... Don't.

I don't really know or even care if the virus exists. It doesn't matter. You know what DOES matter? That I can (hopefuly) look the families of the victims in the eye and NOT make an ass out of myself. Can you say the same? No of course you can't. And you will make up an excuse about it too, you are trying to save people you will say. That you just do it cause you 'care too much'. Do you? Do you really? I can't say of course. But let me tell you what they will see. A bitch. An asshole. A crazy person. You will spit in the face of their reality and trample their beliefs I bet. Just to be right. And you won't actually care one bit. And in the end, it will accomplish nothing either way!

Am I wrong? Am I off base here? I hope so. Why don't you try it? Find people who were actually personally hurt by all this and see what they say. See what they tell you. Go talk to a doctor and find out what they have to say. Oh maybe they are just all part of the evil conspiracy too, of course! Okay, maybe talk to some more. Surely their can't be THAT many people that are part of it right? And of course there will even probably be some that believe you after all! Maybe you can help form a resistance! Maybe you can fight back! Maybe you can expose the truth!

... Except you won't do any of that, will you? You will just be stuck there waiting for an end that will never come. Spiraling down down down into yourself more and more and more. And in the end, you won't care at all. Not one bit.

... Okay, maaaybe I have listened to this album too much when I was a teenager.