Khobrah

Take it somewhere and have a professional read it and see what they say. Submit it online. They'll tell you something similar. Unless your response is some proof you did this, I'm not replying to you anymore.

A novice writer who's not willing to take criticism from educated professional writers? I'm done.

I would prefer the one playthrough...unless there's additional added value for replaying it, such as a different storyline for a different character/class, different story paths to choose, new optional bosses/dungeons, new game+, etc..

This man...this.

I think this could be a unique concept depending on the direction you took with it. And give yourself some credit...the brief world you've built so far isn't bad at all. If you went in the direction of a party based RPG i think it would be relatively unique...but as a solo character game it may seem a bit like Dante's Inferno, Dark Souls, or God of War. So if solo is the direction you want to go how will you make your game stand apart from games like these? Perhaps maybe a sacrificial party system similar to Valkyrie Profile? Enlist aid of souls also trapped in the purgatory only to later sacrifice them to proceed further to your objective? Just a quick spitball. Either way you go with it, it seems interesting enough so far. Perhaps even set it up so the other characters not chosen are the ones you meet on your journey that get sacrificed. That could add some replay value to encourage players to try the other classes to see how the stories change. Last thought...maybe a berserker type class may be interesting? Someone who was betrayed and killed unexpectedly by an ally and is now fueled by revenge.

Like I said...you're young. Keep writing, keep learning. Eventually as you grow older and mature into a seasoned writer you'll understand my points. Right now you're just not ready to hear it. You're not looking to understand what I'm telling you....you're looking for a way to defend your points and exercise your intelligence to "disprove my arguments". NONE of the issues I brought up are personal, the only PERSONAL issue I have with your story I never mentioned, because it's a personal issue and would be biased. What would my purpose for taking time out of my life be to comment on your thread to voice my personal feelings about settings in your plot? To force you to change it and adapt to my idea of how the world should be? I'd never get anything done living like that. I took the time to reply to help you and impart knowledge about script writing and storytelling that's taught by professionals. Now personally... This is all I'll say on the matter...don't want to hear it from me? That's fine, take it somewhere and have a professional read it and see what they say. Submit it online, I can refer you to 2 or 3 good sites for script reviewing and critiquing. They tell you something similar.

Well I wasn't going to go into further detail, but it's like this:

Not automatically....but a large majority of them are, they're supposed to be. RM is an engine designed primarily for those who are neophytes in the game design world...so many RM games are creator s1st, 2nd, and 3rd attempts at game design. Most people, regardless of talent, will take 3-4 attempts before they start pushing out really polished gems.

You're not getting the point....and most likely b/c you're being defensive over yourself and your script, which I totally understand, but you're gonna have to break that habit if you plan on producing art for entertainment. So moving on...yes that was random and kind of out of left field...was just something that came to mind I wanted to share. Of course it wasn't something I intended on you to consider for this script as it's largely finished. Just something to try out when starting on future scripts. You're young, smart, and passionate. Read, learn, read! Repeat! You learn to do that you'll go a long way.

No problem. World: Characters: One thing I've recently fell in love with in script writing is to have a co-writer who operates as the antagonist. After writing each act, go back over the act with your antagonist, and at each sequence that effects the antagonist ask them how they would react. If their answer coincides with what happens in the Act...move on to the next sequence, if not, discuss adjusting it. This process can add a lot of dynamic to your script.

Hmmm....I can help with plot and character development...maybe some of my other skills later on, just not sure how deep I'm willing to invest at the moment. Here's a few things I would look at in your plot. World(May contain plot spoilers): Characters(May contain plot spoilers): Overall it may seem like I'm tearing your story down, but I'm not. You took a lot of time and put a lot of thought into it, so I did the same with my response.

I like the tunic on Marina....it flows nicely.

Finished the terrain for the world map. Will probably take a break from mapping and work on redoing characters.

3 years later....I've decided to start this project back up from scratch using RPG Maker MV. Long story short: Every bit of work I had on this project was "lost in the fire" 3 years ago and until now I was too discouraged to start it back over from scratch...but now here I am...and I'm ready to SLOWLY start bringing it back into fruition. Wish me luck and keep an eye out for updates!