I agree with basically everything here xp I'm not totally educated, but I have looked into Japan society quite a bit out of interest:
From what I understand, they're really kind of another version of the USA over there? There's a few different points, there's a kind of 'aesthetic' that doesn't really exist over here, but their entire culture is based on conformity. There's SO MANY rules to everything you do out in public and in your own home. Some people that move there say they grow to appreciate the rules and that it brings a sense of stability etc., and others find it stifling. I think Paranoia Agent, that you brought up, is one of the closest examples I've seen of what the society over there is actually like- Which paralleled America in a lot of ways.
So yeah, getting back to anime, I got into it myself knowing that there's going to be just as much corporate produced, shilled out shows there as there are in Western cartoons. Most anime isn't all that great, if you ask me, but I think the same thing applies to just about every mass-produced medium, and should be approached with a few grains of salt. Like anything else ya? ANYONE can make an anime, after all.
Oh, and I personally just go with calling 'anime' whatever animation that was originally produced in Japan. Things like Avatar: The Last Airbender I call 'anime-inspired cartoons.' Seems to save confusion a bit ^^;
I do also think it's funny that Japan is simultaneously the happiest country in the world, and also has the highest suicide rate. Just from observing, I think there's a lot of escapism in the culture, especially in the form of anime. There's a lot of encouragement and niceities, but that's because in Japan you're going to be working yourself to the bone your whole life, or risk being totally excluded. Shame society, yeah o.o;
That being said I do LIKE the culture, even if it's still xenophobic and sexist (tell me about one that isn't D;) and I love learning kanji, the language is really wonderful and conveys a lot more than Latin based languages can, I'd love to be fluent and ditch English, but still not sure if I want to jump on the bandwagon and move there... Only if I can live on Tashirojima, I'm thinkin -wink wink-