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These are lyrics I relate to. The artist is amazing to boot.
"...You can't understand unless you've walked in my shoes..."
♫There's an outcast in everybody's life, and I am her (I am her)...♫
♫There's a shadow in everybody's front door, and I am her (I am her)...♫
♫There's a dark cloud in everybody's sunlight, and I am her (I am her)...♫
♫Oh no, I am her...♫
I'm no stranger to being an outcast, that's what makes me unique, partially. I don't follow the path someone else takes, and I revoke rebuttal when I know that the rebuttal is pure nonsense.
I don't care what anyone else says or thinks. I may be a pessimist, but I didn't choose to be. Just like I didn't choose to be imprisoned inside of mortal flesh. There are times when things unexplained, uncontrollable with outcome, can't be seen with foresight or circumvented, happen. That type of nonsense though, has happened to me without my consent or my say, far many more times than fair or balanced. I do fine without your interference, thanks. Leave me be, that's all I require. Don't screw with me, don't promise me things you've no intention on delivering, don't say nice things to me, and go behind my back and rebuke them, and in general, don't be stupid, because one come a time, you're gonna come to me asking for something, or perhaps begging and pleading, and I'm going to say NO. You've burdened me with your misconduct, allowing me to take the fall too many times, and I won't have anymore.
No, this is not aimed at anyone in particular, but those who know they've screwed with me in this way, know that I've been wronged by them. Whether or not they care, that's not on me.
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Doubt you how? I won't lie and say I agree with everything you say, because we both know that's not true. Do you mean if I think you are exaggerating to get attention or some crap like that? I frankly really have no idea and don't really care that much. I have told you that before. All I know is talking with you is interesting, so I do it. I am sure you are telling your own story same as me and everyone else.
Hehe, yeah. I agree that me having far more decency than most people speaks volumes. I am just am not sure you quite get the message I am trying to say yet. So let me be frank then. I have said it before: I think trying to be a 'good' person is exactly the problem. Humans are so obsessed with their own moral superiority, with being 'better'. Me? I don't bother. That dosn't mean I go around doing horrible things all the time, because frankly, when it comes right down to it, I just don't really want to.
How many humans kill or worse in the name of some 'cause' they believe in? In some 'greater good'? It's that very sentiment that makes human society such a messed up place. Everyone feels they have to play moral police for everyone else. I mean, I don't mind people having some kinds of ethical standards and principles or a basic frame work of rules, but that's just practical. Some basic standards of 'decency' is just a smart policy that helps everyone get along a bit better. But I refuse to be a 'good' person. I also refuse to be an 'evil' person. Having such a narrow reductive view of things doesn't help anyone, least of all myself.
There is this thing called the Trolly Problem in ethical theory. Is it better, it asks, to push one person into an oncoming train to save many people? What you decide to do or not do in that moment... That's up to you, and you will have to live with it no matter what. But to think you choice was the 'right' one? Ha! What a joke. Like it's your 'responsibility' or not to make that decision. Like your decision, or lack of decision, would be justified after the fact and everything would be okay. Like that act would really make you a 'hero' or a 'villian'.
Nay I say.
No mater what the outcome, it's a tragedy. You can't change that in that moment. Well maybe if you find a way to save everyone, but some times there isn't any. Plus what if you were reading the situation wrong? What if it's not needed to sacrifice someone? Are you a train expert? Do you have the training? Even if you are, are you infallible?
That's an extreme situation, but people face their own little trolly problems every day. But humans want a simple answer they can always look to, and so they invented the concept of 'good' and 'evil'. And then, as humans tend to do, they forgot that they aren't the way things actually are but ideas they invented and have twisted the ideas into ridiculous shapes to serve their own agendas.
Plus being 'good' all the time is no fun at all! Come on, I gotta at least be a little bit selfish from time to time!
As in, my character. But I know that it wasn't a jab at my character at all. Just one of those anomalies that occurs in a moment of slight thought instability. Not even a big deal, and easier to deal with than to explain, lol
I put 'good' in quotes for a reason. For. A. Reason. Pretty sure it's obvious why.
I'll explain anyway though, and for the record, I hate the aforementioned psy-op test (don't get me started on how unethical that damn thing is). You've a lot more decency than most people I know, because you've been in my shoes in one form or more, that's a given fact. I'll even take the trolley problem and I can see what you would do. You would make the trolley stop through some method (trolleys are actually rather easy to derail). But enough about that. You treat people the way you would want to be treated, and I cannot say the same for 97% of the population. That's what makes you a decent person, flaws and all. I have my own flaws, but I don't admit to flaws people say I have unless I know what they tell me to be true.
I don't take BS, but I certainly don't give it either. I was raised better, credited or not, rebuttal be damned.
I wouldn't say it was a 'jab', just advice. I hold no malice to you. But I told you before, I think you have fallen into a trap. I don't think it's your fault, or anyone else's. And that's not really the point anyway.
If I had all my magical fairy powers, enough time to think about it, knew everything I had to work with, and were nearby enough, I probobly would try and save everyone I guess. I mean why not? Might be a fun challenge. I would have nothing to lose. It would just be another game to play. If I were just a normal human bystander though, you know what I would likely do? Nothing at all. Why not? Because it's not my job and it's more then likely I would just make things worse with my grandstanding heroics anyway.
Because 97% of the population have no idea what the heck they are doing, and most of them don't even care. Though there are lots of times when I don't know what the heck I am doing either to be honest, but I think I know more then most for one very important reason: I actually pay attention most of the time. And flaws? Flaws would imply there is some objective template of a person I have to live up to, and I don't believe that. Won't say I don't have 'quirks' though.
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