AutumnAbsinthe

There's a difference between playing games with someone's head and traumatizing someone. My ex? He genuinely hurt me to the point where I've been diagnosed with an actual trauma disorder and have regular therapy sessions just to deal with the after effects of what he did to me. You? You're playful. You like being funny and messing around. You haven't done anything traumatizing (AFAIK), nor have you put someone in therapy for the foreseeable future because they can't listen to a song or play a game or deal with a character or watch a show (again, AFAIK).

At this point, is anybody a "good person"? Apparently, I've done my fair share of traumatizing people. Apparently, I've hurt people. I've apparently done horrible, appalling things. I think these days, it's difficult to not hurt people though, intentionally or not. Is it sad? Yep. Is it avoidable? Nope. Can you minimize it? Yep. Can you stop it entirely? Nope.

I might be a bit too playful sometimes. Maybe I haven't really traumatized anyone, but I sure have pissed some people off!

I don't even want to be a 'good person'. Seems to me that of the 'evil' committed by humans, a lot of it comes from so called 'good people' in the name of some 'greater good' or some other excuse. Most of the time I rather be an honest villain then a hypocritical hero, at least to myself.

I've been labeled as narcissist before...

Truth is, it's only narcissism if I'm putting myself first to make others feel bad. Unfortunately, I get guilt-tripped a lot and yeah, I've been abused beyond the point of no return, to where I'll have co-dependency syndrome for the rest of my imprisonment...

I won't go too far into this, but I know what it is like to be abused. About all I can do to survive day to day is to use all my coping techniques, and the only true way out at the present is permanently removing myself from the equation.