SinfulBeauty 95 Posted March 24, 2015 (edited) Hey, guys! So I'm starting a side project due to the fact that I lack resources for the main project. It's called "Love You to Death" *WARNING* Contains profanity Story: A young high school student Shirou is in constant distress with his life. The other students are rude and pathetic and always pick on him. Some of the teachers don't give two shits whether their students fail or kill each other. His parents are divorced. What else could go wrong? One day, most of Shirou's problems were... kind of surpressed. That same day, he is introduced to Aki, a new student. She was all that a lusty gentleman could ask for: lovely body with the most luscious curves, beautiful red hair, sparkly blue eyes, and an angel's voice. She takes pity on Shirou when gets gets bullied by Kudoh, calling him a "lonely faggot street-rat". Aki tells him and his goons to back off "or else", which they willingly do. Shirou and Aki quickly became friends from that point on. She had vowed to protect him at all costs, which Shirou though was "melodramatic" Assumptions that the two were dating catches the attention of Mai, Shirou's childhood friend. They were the best of friends and always stuck together until she moved farther from Shirou and took Advanced Placement classes. When Aki falls in love with Shirou, who doesn't give her a straight answer, she grows into some sort of bloodthirsty frenzy. She felt as if she had been a tool all along, but she didn't blame Shirou... she blamed every girl in Priina High, including Mai. Noticing the relationship between Shirou and Mai grow somewhat romantic and overhearing all of the pretty girls talk about how they found Shirou "kind of cute" and that they happen to have some hots for him, Aki believes that the only way to win his heart is at the point of a knife. Being a demon, Aki uses her power to have the entire school on lockdown, trapping most of the students and staff. As a "double lock", Aki also draws the school down to her Hell Plain. As the school writhes with sinister spirits, ghosts and demons, Shirou must escape this Hell... or at least survive Aki's demonic onslaught. Your typical Yandere horror game but with my little twist. It takes place at Priina High School, one of the few high schools in Redneval, Sargosso. The same continent where "Night Core: The Legend of Aesir", the main project, takes place. Kind of like Misao, The Witch's House, and Mad Father mixed together with a little bit of Outlast thrown into the mix. Edited March 29, 2015 by SinfulBeauty 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tsarmina 2,612 Posted March 25, 2015 She was all that a lusty gentleman could ask for: lovely body with the most luscious curves, beautiful red hair, sparkly blue eyes, and an angel's voice. lovely body with the most luscious curves, beautiful red hair, sparkly blue eyes, and an angel's voice. beautiful red hair red hair ajdl;fjaorjg;aksdjf yaaaaaaaaahs. I have to say...idk why but I was never really the type to love yandere characters. :x This really has me captivated though totally not because of the red haired antagonist and I find the idea pretty intriguing. Is it going to be like a survival game? I'm guessing horror elements for sure. I'm really hoping for some sort of dramatic love twisty tangled gnarly situation with lots of romantic competition or something of the sort Regardless, you've fed me enough information to get me interested! I look forward to development <3 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SinfulBeauty 95 Posted March 25, 2015 She was all that a lusty gentleman could ask for: lovely body with the most luscious curves, beautiful red hair, sparkly blue eyes, and an angel's voice. lovely body with the most luscious curves, beautiful red hair, sparkly blue eyes, and an angel's voice. beautiful red hair red hair ajdl;fjaorjg;aksdjf yaaaaaaaaahs. I have to say...idk why but I was never really the type to love yandere characters. :x This really has me captivated though totally not because of the red haired antagonist and I find the idea pretty intriguing. Is it going to be like a survival game? I'm guessing horror elements for sure. I'm really hoping for some sort of dramatic love twisty tangled gnarly situation with lots of romantic competition or something of the sort Regardless, you've fed me enough information to get me interested! I look forward to development <3 Oh, well damn! What a coincidence! lol. Thanks for the feedback. I'm actually very quite excited to get started on this project. Oh, and don't worry. There's LOTS of competition... especially when a yandere is involved. TuT This project is something of a survival horror game plus one baseball bat(Misao reference ). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
+ Lyla 41 Posted March 25, 2015 So what you're saying is ... ... if a woman named Aki, with red hair and an amazing body, comes and asks me to be her girlfriend - I should definitely say yes? Otherwise face damnation and a hellish like world until either I somehow slay her or finally accept her demonic love? Good to know! (Sounds interesting, though not my type of game personally. I say go for it though if you can pull the dialogue off well.) 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SinfulBeauty 95 Posted March 25, 2015 (edited) Yeah, you could put it like that. Although, either way you'll be going to Hell anyway. XP I swear, yesterday night when I was done making dem pretty sprites and called it a night, I literally had nightmares about my project's story. TT_TT Edited March 25, 2015 by SinfulBeauty Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SinfulBeauty 95 Posted March 27, 2015 (edited) Dialogue Time! In this scene, Shirou awakes, sprawled across the floor of the Student Body Counsel Room after Aki curses the school. Shirou: Uhg... Am I... dead? ???: Ah. You've come to. Shirou: Whaa!(stands up) W-who are you? ???: I am Mr. Takatsugu. I am the president of the student counsel. You are lucky you have ended up here. The rest of the school has been affected by the Demoness' curse. Shirou: C-c-curse? Mr. Takatsugu: Indeed. The curse has sent this building down into a Plain of Hell. I'm not sure which Plain. Shirou: Hell?! W-we're in Hell?! Mr. Takatsugu: Yes. We are in Hell. One of the Hells, actually. (??? barges into the room) ???: Mr. Takatsugu! This is bad! Really, really bad! Mr. Takatsugu: Ah. Greetings, Dictionary. What is the matter? Dictionary: Things are messed up to a point where I don't know where I am right now! Does that make sense? Well, you know what I mean! Evil spirits and demons are spawning all over the school. The only safe havens are this room and the Library. I've seen a spirit kill a student before my eyes. I'll never look at hamburgers the same again! Mr. Takatsugu: Thank you for the report, Miss Dictionary. You may retire for now. Dictionary: Alrighty! I'll be in the Library if you need me. Please, Mister, be safe and don't lose your limbs. Laters! (Dictionary leaves) Mr. Takatsugu: It appears that Aki's curse summoned the demons. Wandering about alone would be suicide. Although, you seem quite the survivor. Not many have lived during the school's sinking. Also, it is you she wants. Only you can stop her. Shirou: So the fate of everyone depends on me going on a date with a demon girl? Mr. Takatsugu: Not necessarily. You can find and exterminate her if you'd like. Do whatever you choose to do with her. Just remember: all of your actions will determine your fate. Save whom you can save, kill whom you can kill. Just remember all the lives that depend on your actions. Not that there are many to count. Shirou: Well... I guess I don't have a choice. I'll find Aki. And save my friends. Mr. Takatsugu: Gods watch over you. Good luck. Edited March 27, 2015 by SinfulBeauty 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Point08 219 Posted March 27, 2015 Some of it sounds a bit silly, but from what I know of this genre, it's a mix of horror and comedy, so that's appropriate. So given that, there's only 2 parts I think might need a look: "I don't think I'd eat hamburgers the same again!" -This sentence just doesn't sound right to me. A few options would be: -I don't think I'll ever eat a hamburger again! -I don't think I'll ever look at hamburgers the same again! -I'll never look at hamburgers the same again! The first and third options I think sound better than the second. The next part is the dialogue of Miss Dictionary. She's very doom and gloom when she first arrives, but when she leaves she says, "[a]lrighty! I'll be in the Library if you need me. Tootles!" As I said, since I believe this genre is a mix of horror and comedy, the above contradiction is fine, as long as it remains consistently part of her character. What I mean is, she needs to be freaking out, and then all sunshine and rainbows a gain throughout the game, otherwise the contradiction here will become a glaring out of character moment. My guess would be this is part of her character, but just in case, I figured it was worth mentioning. As the second part I mentioned is fine in the circumstances I mentioned, outside the hamburger line it sounds like exactly the sort of dialogue I would expect to find in an anime of this nature. Keep it up! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
When Bugs Roam Ur House 656 Posted March 27, 2015 Shirou and Aki quickly become friends. Assumptions that the two were dating catches the attention of Mai, Shirou's childhood friend. They are the best of friends and always stick together. When Aki falls in love with Shirou, who doesn't give her a straight answer, she grows into some sort of bloodthirsty frenzy. Noticing the relationship between Shirou and Mai and overhearing all of the pretty girls that happen to have some hots for him, Aki believes that the only way to win one's heart is at the point of a knife. Personally, imho.... I wasn't going to say anything at first, but i think this part should/could be made a bit more realistic. (Sorry if that sounds bad/ is too blunt) What i mean by that is, i think Aki and Shirou should have a cause-and-effect reason for why they quickly become friends. I mean, as a rhetorical question, what makes Shirou different from all the other high school boys who probably like her, to where Aki would choose to be his friend? Maybe he could discover something embarassing about her, which motives her to frequently confront/stick around him, slowly making them become friends; she then starts liking him because he's funny/ always tries to reassure her. To the part where she turns into a bloodthirsty frenzy, i think it would be better if she first just felt jealous, because she doesn't understand why her, in hot demand by every other guy, doesn't have Shirou jumping up and down from her confession. Then, maybe she asks him out on a date/hangout, but Shriou can't go/has to leave early because of homework. Aki then finds out him and Mai were studying together. Finally, maybe one of her best friends gets asked out by her crush, and then Aki notices the relationship between Shirou and Mai. She feels jealous, betrayed/angry/"played", and foolish/embarassed/sad. From this, i also think you could even have Aki dislike Shiriou not because she hates him, but moreso because she's sad. But either the player doesn't realize this as well, or you are given the option to have pity for Aki at the end. Just my opinions. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SinfulBeauty 95 Posted March 27, 2015 Thanks you guys for you feedback! I've decided to put more detail in the story. Hopefully it will be more understandable. Once again, thanks a bunch! X3 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
HumanNinja 144 Posted March 28, 2015 I don't know what all that Japanese stuff is but, it sounds like an interesting story. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Enneagon 20 Posted March 29, 2015 I'm down for the main concept, but bits of this are bugging me. If Mai and Shirou are so close, where was she while he was being bullied? And if they're so close, how did his and Aki's relationship progress so far without this ever coming up? Why do all the ladies suddenly have the hots for the guy who gets beaten up a lot? For that matter, why did Aki fall for him in the first place? (I have a strong dislike of stories in which the main character is inexplicably a love magnet.) I'm guessing that all you want is to play around with a simple yandere story, but as is it's just reminding me of stories I've heard before, and not in a good way. I'm not feeling a unique hook yet. Spitballing: Would it change the story significantly if the genders of the characters were reversed? Or if the story was told from Mai's point of view? Or suppose Shirou actually was gay the whole time? Is this going to be played straight, or satirize the genre? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SinfulBeauty 95 Posted March 29, 2015 (edited) Thanks for your input! Time to put EVEN MORE detail in the story. -.- Shirou is definitely not a girl magnet. The girls in the school are suddenly attracted to him because all of the sudden, a gorgeous, flawless, extremely attractive girl starts hanging with him. Now their all like. "Ooo! Aki looks like she's having a blast with him. Maybe he's not all that bad. He is kinda cute in a way." That's when most of his problems are suppressed. Mai recently moved, but not too far from the school. She takes Advanced Placement classes and is busy almost all time, clogging up all the time she and Shirou could have been together. They see each other rarely. Aki at first pitied him, then got to know him better. It seems as though the two lived similar lives. Divorced parents, being picked on, and the like. Although, Aki's life (of course) is 10x more darker than Shirou's. She does find him attractive in a way. Shirou does mention Mai sometimes, but Aki tends to drop conversations pertaining to "them". I'm trying to focus this story with the five stages of grief, the seven deadly sins/cardinal virtues, and the like. Religion also plays a huge role in this story. Plus, the story will focus on Aki's backstory, because, of course, she isn't just a yandere. There is a person with an intelligence and view of the world and is willing to change it, be it good or bad. Edited March 29, 2015 by SinfulBeauty 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kayzee 4,032 Posted April 3, 2015 I don't know, I rather play as the yandere. <3 That sounds way more fun then playing as the yandere's toy. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SinfulBeauty 95 Posted April 3, 2015 I don't know, I rather play as the yandere. <3 That sounds way more fun then playing as the yandere's toy. *COUGH COUGH* Sequel*COUGH COUGH* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kayzee 4,032 Posted April 3, 2015 Hehe... or alternate game mode maybe? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
