rmvxa Breathwind: Return of the Dragons (E0 v2.3 Released)

[syrus ultima 44]

You need to add me to your credits section for the maps.

[+ Novem 344]

Your in the special thanks section, which is a subsection of the credits,

[INDOJIN 70]

Hey, Meathran's sword's description cuts off. Might as well as get it fixed.

Edited May 24, 2012 by Manjith Murali

[+ Novem 344]

Gotcha! I'll fix that up,

[+ Novem 344]

Hello folks, I'd like to announce the final update for Breathwind: Return of the Dragons Episode 0. 1.3FINAL will include the following.

 

-New Opening Cutscene

-Introduction to the World Map

-New Scripts

-Massive Codex Update

-All Codex Entries will have VO

-Additional Combat Balancing

-Addition of Narrator to the Story

-Some Landmarks Added to The Heart of the Volcano

 

 

This update will be released tomorrow night at the current rate of work. The Voiceovers for the Codex Entries have to be fully completed and a final combat of the new version needs to be conducted. If for some reason tomorrow does not work out, I personally guarantee you it will be here by Monday. Then work can continue on the 30 times bigger Episode 1.

[+ Novem 344]

Sorry for the delay everyone, new version was supposed to be released tonight but I've encountered a few problems.

 

I completed all of the voice work, finished all of the needed Codex entries, and evented everything that needed to be. Everything SHOULD be ready, but it isn't due to errors with Tidloc's Questlog that prevent the full integrity of the Codex system. As soon as the bugs are fixed, the final version will be released.

 

In the meantime, why don't you check out the games new opening cutscene? The main topic has been updated with a youtube version of it, just in-case people with weak ass computers like mine have trouble playing them in-game.

Edited May 27, 2012 by Niko Jose DelValle

[+ Novem 344]

Okay everyone! It's official, v1.3FINAL has been completed thanks to some help from Tidloc himself. Enoy!

 

v1.3FINAL: http://www.mediafire.com/?cp7ygn45ez1rkc4

[amerk 1,122]

Remember to edit your last post if less than 72 hours.

[Harmill 5]

I will be trying the new demo later this evening, but I just want to say that I really like it when developers post semi 'patch notes' like you do. Considering I've already played this demo, it really helps to see your breakdown of what you've changed between the previous version and the latest version. This helps me, as a player/tester, to know what to look for in terms of changes. So thanks for posting patch notes for us!

[+ Novem 344]

Remember to edit your last post if less than 72 hours.

 

Oops, sorry about that,

 

I will be trying the new demo later this evening, but I just want to say that I really like it when developers post semi 'patch notes' like you do. Considering I've already played this demo, it really helps to see your breakdown of what you've changed between the previous version and the latest version. This helps me, as a player/tester, to know what to look for in terms of changes. So thanks for posting patch notes for us!

 

Yup, always want to make sure you know what to look for.

 

I may have made combat a bit to difficult now though, I'm not sure...

[syrus ultima 44]

Ill check your demo out when I get the chance. You are putting a lot of work into it i can tell.

[+ Novem 344]

Yup, I'm trying my best!

 

I especially put a ton of work into the VO's for the Codex. It took several hours of recording in a very hot room with closed windows and no fan or AC because I needed silence.

[syrus ultima 44]

Ok. What I have checked out so far is looking good. I like the music and how you implemented into each place. I think my best advice I can give since I am a recording engineer would be to use a good pair of studio headphones when doing the recordings. You have a good clear voice but to me I feel you are speaking way to fast in some parts and the words run together. You might be limited to just a regular pc mic, but if you can get one, I would suggest getting a unidirectional mic. Don't hold the mic too close to your mouth, as you will most likely get pops and cracks in the recording. Or you could use a pop screen. if you don't have one, you could slip a clean sock over the mic to reduce it from picking up other noise. Also the volume needs to be higher. Don't rush your words when speaking. and a good rule of thumb is, if you listen to recordings back a thousand times you will begin to think, yea "this sounds great" I know I been there, Gotta train your ears to pick up whats good and bad.

 

For the game in general obviously I like the maps. The story fits well with how you made the events. I would say you are off to one hell of a start. I like the notes as currency notes. Very original. I didn't play it all the way through. I made it to the volcano.

 

Keep at it. Don't rush.

[+ Novem 344]

Yes, its not actually that I'm speaking quietly, it's because I keep the microphone very far away from my mouth to avoid sound distortion. It's pretty bad whenever I get it to close (and I have the mic on 19 vol!).

 

I decided that a world that has existed as long as Breathwind should be at the level of technology we are now, but because of Magic, people don't have a very good want for innovation and technology as we do, but some commodities would be similar, such as paper currency and modern democracy. That's why Windma is based almost directly off the United States. I decided it would be neat to experiment with modern politics in a Fantasy setting.

 

But then you also have Breathill which is still stilted in old ways and furious religion, and the Atheist Ilanza which is stuck somewhere in-between the two.

 

Oh, and I use a pair of Sennheiser HD-201's, but it's really difficult to speak with them on so I take them off when I'm recording. I do admit I tend to speak to fast though, I'm a fast-paced person.

Edited May 28, 2012 by Niko Jose DelValle

[gentlemanorcus 1]

I played through the demo. Here are some extensive notes. I would talk about your grammar but I've already spent enough time writing these notes as it is:

 

Intro movie

* The voice acting is a cool idea. Speak louder and clearer.

* Why is there a picture of a guy with a katana when this is a western European medieval fantasy world?

* Keep the pictures you take from other sources consistent. It's kind of weird to go from a drawing of a samurai to a CG picture of a dragon. Keep a consistent art style with pictures you take from other sources.

* Don't call them "dragon riders", come up with something original.

* The splash text of the title is too urban.

 

Meathran in Library

* The narrator is a bit cheesy. I'd say do your narrations over a black screen. So you say "our story starts with Meathran in a library", and then it cuts to Meathran.

* When Meathran tells the guy to put the thing on the desk, clarify he is speaking to the person knocking. Have Meathran say something like, "yes, yes, come in, and put it on the table." Then further down in the dialog box: "Damn book!"

* "Heart Mountains" is a stupid name.

* So the not-butler is named John. This is more of a pet-peeve of mine than anything, but in my opinion, fantasy stories should stay consistent with their naming. Either use only made-up name or real life names. I don't like it when a story has a mix. This is more of a nitpick than anything,

* Type out numbers in text.

* A character named "India"? Really?

* So does Meathran know about the dragon egg or does he not? He sent out riders, but he still needs John to explain it to him. Make up your mind.

 

Meathran at mountain

* It's cool that you included a tutorial.

* Combat looks great, though of course that can't really be attributed to you since it's Yanfly's script.

* You don't need to say who made what scripts in the game. it detracts from immersion. Credits in the OP and ending should be enough.

* The Codex is an awesome idea. In the future, though, add a way to scroll down the text entries. Also, some of the text goes off-screen.

* The compass is a cool idea.

* The victory theme sounds like the theme for Avatar: The Last Airbender. Maybe it's just me?

* You should add some effects when walking around in the volcano, like tinting the screen red a bit. It's a volcano.

* You need to heal the player to full health and mana after the tutorial.

* Fighting the monsters in the mountain is really easy, but i assume that this is for story reasons; Maethran and Oslo are powerful.

* Add some more banter between Maethran and Oslo as they walk through the mountain. It would expand their characters and make it less monotonous.

* So you get to the heart of the volcano and SUDDEN DIFFICULTY SPIKE. I'd suggest splitting the volcano into three maps, having the chump enemies (skeletons, ghosts), in the first enemy, tougher enemies in the second (like the imps), and the werewolves in the third. That makes the difficulty spike less sudden.

* Why on earth would anybody consume malium? Why are there so many werewolves, and why are they in the middle of a volcano?

* Put the trials on a separate map and remove encounters.

* Good god, put some save points in. I died and had to start a new game (which I didn't; I just edited the map in Ace and made my start point the trials. I shouldn't have to do that.)

* Either I suck or the vampire is way too hard. I mean, just one of his spells subtracted half of each member's lives. Which would be fine, except I had used up all my items and mana getting through the maze (not bothering to pick up many items; mind you). Once again, I had to go into Ace and edit the vampire's HP to be 1, which, once again, I shouldn't have to do.

* The Celestial Force seems pretty one-dimensional. I'll assume you're going to give him a reason for wanting the destruction of the world later in the story, but it's not a great introduction for a villain.

* The scene withe the riders pooling their power for a final strike is pretty effective. Good music choice.

 

Overall:

I've never been a fan of Eragon, to be honest, but it seems this is different enough to tell its own story. There are numerous grammatical mistakes that detract from the writing, but the writing itself, though not spectacular, does what it needs to do well enough. I really like some of your ideas, especially the fully-voiced Codex. However, the gameplay is pretty unbalanced- the first area is really easy, and then in the second area, it suddenly gets too hard. The difficulty spike needs to be more gradual.

 

This definitely has potential, but it is flawed by unbalanced gameplay and numerous grammatical mistakes. Keep it at, though, you have a lot of good ideas that just need to be refined (a lot)- I can tell.

 

EDIT: Looking through your project, it seems you don't have any test maps. Those are essential, just to test enemies and situations.

Edited May 29, 2012 by gentlemanorcus

[+ Novem 344]

* Don't call them "dragon riders", come up with something original.

 

No, I like the name.

 

* The splash text of the title is too urban.

 

The text style was not my choice, I didn't make the title screen.

 

* "Heart Mountains" is a stupid name.

 

No it isn't, the Heart Mountains are a Mountain Range in Central Breathill. They are literally the "Heart" of Breathwind.

 

* So the not-butler is named John. This is more of a pet-peeve of mine than anything, but in my opinion, fantasy stories should stay consistent with their naming. Either use only made-up name or real life names. I don't like it when a story has a mix. This is more of a nitpick than anything,

 

That is indeed a nitpick.

 

* A character named "India"? Really?

 

Yes, really. She's a side character, does it matter?

 

* So does Meathran know about the dragon egg or does he not? He sent out riders, but he still needs John to explain it to him. Make up your mind.

 

Your forgetting that he leads the most powerful force on the face of the Continent. He has plenty of other responsibilities and situations that need handling, he can't be expected to remember every detail. Although, this is mostly to introduce the player to current events.

 

* It's cool that you included a tutorial.

 

Thank you.

 

* Combat looks great, though of course that can't really be attributed to you since it's Yanfly's script.

 

But... I'm the one who chose it,

 

* The Codex is an awesome idea. In the future, though, add a way to scroll down the text entries. Also, some of the text goes off-screen.

 

Pg Up and Pg Dn control scrolling. I forgot to mention that in the Tut, sorry.

 

* The compass is a cool idea.

---

* The victory theme sounds like the theme for Avatar: The Last Airbender. Maybe it's just me?

---

* You should add some effects when walking around in the volcano, like tinting the screen red a bit. It's a volcano.

---

* You need to heal the player to full health and mana after the tutorial.

---

* Add some more banter between Maethran and Oslo as they walk through the mountain. It would expand their characters and make it less monotonous.

---

* So you get to the heart of the volcano and SUDDEN DIFFICULTY SPIKE. I'd suggest splitting the volcano into three maps, having the chump enemies (skeletons, ghosts), in the first enemy, tougher enemies in the second (like the imps), and the werewolves in the third. That makes the difficulty spike less sudden.

---

* Why on earth would anybody consume malium? Why are there so many werewolves, and why are they in the middle of a volcano?

---

* Put the trials on a separate map and remove encounters.

---

* Good god, put some save points in. I died and had to start a new game (which I didn't; I just edited the map in Ace and made my start point the trials. I shouldn't have to do that.)

---

* Either I suck or the vampire is way too hard. I mean, just one of his spells subtracted half of each member's lives. Which would be fine, except I had used up all my items and mana getting through the maze (not bothering to pick up many items; mind you). Once again, I had to go into Ace and edit the vampire's HP to be 1, which, once again, I shouldn't have to do.

---

* The Celestial Force seems pretty one-dimensional. I'll assume you're going to give him a reason for wanting the destruction of the world later in the story, but it's not a great introduction for a villain.

---

* The scene withe the riders pooling their power for a final strike is pretty effective. Good music choice.

---

There are numerous grammatical mistakes that detract from the writing.

 

Thanks! But thank also Tidloc for coding it up for me,

---

It is indeed from Avatar, it's "The End of Avatar" By Jeremy Zucherman. I also use "The Last Agni-Kai" By Jeremy Zucherman in the final battle against The Celestial Force.

---

Good point, I'll do that in the version to be associated with Episode 1.

---

I'll make sure to do that.

---

To late for that now, this is the final version

---

Considering this is just a tutorial map, I don't think that would be a good idea. I will change the troops in the map and reduce the power of the Celestial Force when Episode 1 comes out to make the difficulty spike more gradual.

---

Malium is an extremely powerful substance. Magic users can consume it to increase the power of their spells. Mana Enhancement Potions and Mana Potions are actually Malium enhanced with special qualities.

 

There are so many Werewolves because the Celestial Force is there. Anybody that gets near the Mountain can be turned due to the emanation of pure evil from the Celestial Force.

---

They are in the middle of the volcano because the CF put them there.

---

I'll make that a no encounter region when Episode 1 is released.

---

Check your pause menu, there is a save button there.

---

I thought I may have made combat a bit to difficult. Some additional balancing needs to be done.

---

Yup, he will become a more in-depth character later. Meathran didn't survive long enough to get anything solid on what he's doing in Breathwind.

---

Found it in a Knights of the Old Republic Music mod, one of my favorite tracks.

---

Point them out and they will be smashed, they really need to add spell and grammar check into RPG Maker...

 

Thanks for playing!

Edited May 29, 2012 by Niko Jose DelValle

[gentlemanorcus 1]

Point them out and they will be smashed, they really need to add spell and grammar check into RPG Maker...

 

I'll get around to pointing out the grammatical mistakes tomorrow.

[Harmill 5]

I agree with a lot of gentlemanorcus wrote. Here are the notes that I took. Since I've already played through this demo, I decided to record grammar/spelling mistakes, and which lines specifically are cut off in menus so that you can provide more polish.

 

 

Codex:

• The voice loops endlessly when played. There's no way to stop it besides exiting the Codex menu.
  
• Magic: You only have a voice over for the 1st and last paragraphs
  
• Breathwind: No voice over
  
• Meathran and Oslo: The paragraphs end but the voice keeps going on, saying things that I can't follow along to.
  
• Meathran and Oslo: He attempted to run and defend the stone from them but failed, just as death seemed inevitable for the young Meathran...the stone started shinin (it's cut off)
  
• Meathran and Oslo: He realized soon after that he could hear the dragon's thoughts, and suddenly remembered the dragons (needs apostrophe) name was Oslo.
  
• The Dragon Riders: They love each other unconditionall (cut off) because they have basically become two halves of the same being.
  
• The Dragon Riders: Text is cut off after a certain point. Last visible line is: "They separate from the riders " and then the next line is cut off. It seems that there is a maximum amount of characters or lines that the script supports. You may have to separate your longer entries into different parts.
  
• The Riders Fortress: All of the Riders (needs apostrophe) operations are issued and conducted from here.
  
• Breathill: No voice over
  
• Breathill: (At Dragonslayers ti (cut off) BTF1033)
  
• Maederan: Maederan is the name of the Rider Sword belongi (cut off)
  
• Ghost: When dead bodies are exposed the (should be "to") Malium
  
• Imps: What do you mean by Imps generally "occur"? I don't think it makes sense with that choice of verb. Imps generally 'appear' might be what you meant?
  

• - The tooltip for the Maederan sword is cut off.
  

Combat:

• I can't legitimately get past through the volcano. Not even past the first map. The Werewolves deal WAY too much damage, and they also have the ability to critical hit, and inflict poison. My Oslo died when he still had 1800 HP because he was hit by a critical hit.
  
• You only provide the player with 1 Stimulant, and it's worthless during a fight. It only brings back a dead party member with 1 HP left? I used it when Oslo died only for him to be targeted the very next turn and die again. Well, looks like I'm not progressing anywhere now.
  
• I chose to spam my spells with Meathran and there was only 1 Magic Water item to replenish my MP. And even then, it only restores 200 MP when Meathran has like 400+ max. Once Meathran ran out of MP, and Oslo was dead, there really wasn't anything I could do against those Werewolves.
  

To late for that now, this is the final version

 

I hope you're not seriously considering this version the absolute final version. What is the point in us pointing out the mistakes and problems if you're not planning on fixing anything? Also, this reminds me that you consistently choose to type 'to' when you mean 'too'. I noticed this in the demo a few times but I guess I forgot to document the specific lines and cutscenes they occur in.

[+ Novem 344]

If I keep working on Episode 0 I will never be able to progress to preparing Episode 1. These fixes will be present when Episode 1 is released of course, as Episode 0 will be packaged in with Episode 1. Don't worry, I still take these bug reports and problems very seriously.

 

To/Too is a common grammatical mistake, I don't really understand the difference. I make the same mistake with there/their/they're

 

There is no way to fix the infinitely looping voice, that's just a part of the script.

 

Also I don't know why those entries didn't get VO'd for you. I made sure they all worked before I uploaded it.

 

I didn't expect there to be this many problems in 1.3FINAL, I'm going to change that to just 1.3 and do 1.31FINAL to fix all of these problems.

[Harmill 5]

'Too' is used to refer to something in excess. This is too much work. You're too energetic. As common as it is, it's painfully obvious when someone uses the wrong to/too.

 

The infinitely looping voice has no workaround? Because it leads to quite the confusion when the voice never ends. There is barely any buffer between the end of the voice clip, and the start, so it sounds quite seamless. If the script really doesn't allow playing a sound clip once without looping, then the only thing I can suggest is leaving a decent amount of time blank at the end of your voice clips.

 

As for whether this is the 'final' version or not, no one is expecting you to fix these bugs ASAP. You can easily work on Episode 1, and occasionally go back to fix certain mistakes from Episode 0 as its convenient. All I'm getting at, is you throw around the term FINAL, and then say things that suggest that you don't plan on fixing something. Saying "Sorry, this is the final version, so it's too late for me to fix that" is a good way to turn play testers away. For the next episode, if you prefer me not nitpicking grammar mistakes, I can focus on core gameplay issues (which are a lot more crucial to fix if you want a good game).

Edited May 29, 2012 by Harmill

[+ Novem 344]

I actually had that adding onto the end idea... but it's to late to go back and do that now...

 

There are nearly 40 voice clips! It would take forever to go back and put silence at the end of every single one in Audacity. I wanted to go back and amplify all of them to, because they are a bit quiet, but the same problem presents itself.

 

Thanks for clarifying to/too for me, although I'll probably still commonly make that mistake, hahaha

 

I prefer you nitpicking both! I want this to be done as professionally as humanly possible.

[Harmill 5]

I understand you not wanting to go back and redoing those 40 voice clips right away. I wouldn't want to either, and would probably choose to fix them after a major release (ie: when you finish and release Episode 1; that's the perfect opportunity for you to take the time to go back and fix some of the more time consuming things). What matters now, is that you take what you've learnt from your voice clips in Episode 0, and make sure to do them properly in Episode 1. Now you know to add a buffer to your future voice clips, and now you know that you need to speak louder for your voice clips. I noticed for a few entries, that your voice read the lines incorrectly. Obviously it's going to be a hassle to 'fix' that by redoing the voice so instead, just readjust what the codex reads so that it matches what you say.

[+ Novem 344]

Yes, I'm tongue tied, so consistently saying the right this is kind of difficult. Combine that with the fact that I talk really fast, and it really becomes a hassle, hahahaha

 

As you say, I'm going to go back and do every single one of those VO's over again with the next major release (OMG, what did I just commit myself to?). I held the mic to far away, I need to find the perfect position for it, and also add on some amplification when it gets to quiet.

[syrus ultima 44]

How much silence do you think you would need in each voice clips to avoid looping? 2-3 minutes? I could do this and amplify all 40 of them in a half an hour to an hour if you want. I have all the right software for doing such tasks. I could also ad more silence in between your sentences that run in to each other but that will take more time.

Edited May 29, 2012 by syrus ultima

[+ Novem 344]

I would guess a minute would be fine, adding more silence would be cool to.

 

Thanks Syrus, I apparently don't have as much tolerance for the tedious as you do, lol